Tyrrell Chevrolet

TLDR: These people dont know diesels. They lie. They mislead. They make up excuses. They play stupid. They do not care about you. They do not care about your car. You have been warned.

Yes, this is a true story. And yes, everything in was actually told to me.

INTRO: I made the grave mistake of taking my 07.5 3500 here with a P0087 low fuel pressure code. After 4 months my truck was not only still broken, but the only improvement made on it was 2 new batteries. And a $3000 bill. I was royally screwed, lied to, misled, and the entire time and I refuse to let myself get mad or angry, even now. So, trying to see the positive in this, I have convinced myself I paid them $500 for new batteries, and $2500 for a new business model that other shops can use to deal with customers they dont want or just blatantly hate, sometimes for no reason but in my case, because of my gorgeous physic. So here is the business model I paid $2500 to learn called THE TYRRELL and it goes like this:

PHASE 1: When the customer calls asking when you can get it in, tell them the end of the week. Back logged 2 weeks? Yeah, end of the week. Someone stole all the cat converters in the service lot that month? End of the week. Dont even want the job? Yeah, end of the week. The customer will be excited and tow their Duramax there at which point you enter PHASE 2.

PHASE 2: Dont get to it for 3 weeks. The secret in this phase is every time the customer calls tell them youd have to go look at it and youll call them back immediately or COB at the latest. Never do. Ever. Once you approach the 3 week mark or if the customer shows up in person, explain a convoluted bureaucratic story of how the work order for their truck was opened then immediately closed. No one knows why. Or how. Promise you will work on their truck next day so they will leave. Dont touch for another week and move onto PHASE 3.

PHASE 3: Batteries. Convince them first thing you need to do is replace batteries. Both. Fuel problem? Needs batteries Cant diagnose it without batteries. Rear end collision? Batteries. Broken windshield? Batteries. At this point, over a month of waiting for some sort of news or progress the customer will be so worn down they will just have you do it and justify it to themselves with something like I was going to do that later this year anyway. Congrats on your easy $500 you may move onto PHASE 4.

PHASE 4: Replace the most expensive part you can find. Oh, the customer already replaced it? Re-replace it. But wait-ask for proof! If they show you proof just find an excuse that it wasnt good enough, such as You got this from Oreilly or This isnt an OEM replacement part or No remanufactured part works. Or all 3. The key here is to ABSOLUTLY REFUSE to do any other work or diagnostics on the vehicle until they consent to it. The customer after 6 weeks will be so worn down and desperate for their vehicle they will have no choice but to authorize work. Move onto PHASE 5.

PHASE 5: Wait for parts. 2 weeks. At least. Stretch it to 3 if you want. Who cares.

PHASE 6: Take apart EVERYTHING! When replacing an injection pump do you need to take out the Y bridge? No. But do it anyway. Does the cab need to come off? No, but do it anyway. Front bumper? Front grille? Parking brake? No. No. No. But do it anyway. More hours to bill. Also, hook up the fuel lines backwards, cant risk it actually fixing it.

PHASE 8: Wait, what about phase 7??? Who cares, the customer is an idiot and doesnt know any better. This is THE TYRRELL business model, we do what we want. Move onto PHASE 9.

PHASE 9: Blame someone else. Uh oh, that part didnt fix the problem? Like the customer tried to tell you? Well God forbid you tell them they were right, blame someone else. That truck had an aftermarket part on it. Big GM told us to and they are stumped on it like we are. That was the previous Service manager, not me. Repeat PHASES 4-9 as needed until the customer begs for their truck back, at which point move onto PHASE 10.

PHASE 10: The bill. Bill the customer whatever you want. You deserve it! $200 core charge, slap it on its non-refundable, and no you dont keep the part either, its company policy. At this point you may also insult the customer and their vehicle however you want in the comments. Go ahead, call it a *** job and probably wouldnt run properly after previous repairs. The customer probably wont read that or mind, in fact, we believe the customer probably cant read at all theyre the customer!

BONUS PHASE! At any point if the customer ever wants to just trade in their truck on a new one offer them $500 for it. Yeah, only two 0s. Five hundred. What? The part thats currently getting put on is $950? Oh well, $500. Oh, we just put $500 worth of batteries on it? Oh well, $500. Screw them, its just the customer. Who cares. Besides, we dont have any 1-ton trucks on the lot anyway.

TO THE DIESEL TECH: If you dont know what you are doing, just stop. Save yourself, the dealer, and the customer the trouble, money, and drama. I hope you stick to something youre good at instead, like oil changes or coloring or maybe a hobby? Common rail diesel just isnt for you, and thats ok champ! Just leave it to real pros like the guys at Mr. Diesel who correctly diagnosed it as injectors, fixed your mixed up lines, and did so in a week.