Those creatures called women! Alluring, mystical, secretive, emotional and indecisive. So simple, yet so complex; so weak, yet so powerful; so confusing, yet so desirable. Men throw their hands up in surrender after battling one of womankind. For the most ingenious of the man-clan, the only enduring mystery they find impossible to crack, is Her. What’s Her secret?

“Men are from Mars women are from Venus” - is just an allegory. Men are definitely from Earth. Women are also trapped here, but they certainly flew from somewhere else. As Unidentified Flying Objects are hard to decipher, women are impossible to explain.

Women cannot be just This or That – they are both. Smart but naïve, passionate but objective, rebellious but traditional, humble but proud, comforting but annoying. They are walking contradictions. Or rather flying contradictions.

Men try hard to establish a clear connection with them, but fail miserably. Nothing they do seems to be right.

If man talks, she wants him to listen,

If he listens, she wants him to talk.

If he always agrees with her, he calls him sluggish,

If he does not, he is not understanding.

If he kisses her, he is not a gentleman,

If he does not, he is not a man.

If he kisses her once in a while, he is cold,

If he kisses her too often, he is taking advantage.

If he praises her, she says he is lying,

If he does not, he does not love her.

If he is jealous, he does not trust her,

If he is not jealous, he does not love her.

If he attempts intimacy, he does not respect her,

If he does not, he does not love her.

Confused and frustrated, men keep trying. Because only this woman object can make them feel like flying, the way no other flying apparatus can. Men try to learn to communicate with women. Men study their weird Womanese language. First they learn that “Communicate with woman” in Womanese means “to agree with her”. And also,

“Yes” in Womanese means “No”.

“No” really means “No”.

“Maybe” really means “No”.

“I’m sorry” really means “You’ll be sorry”.

“We need” means “I want”.

“You want” means “You need”.

“Do you love me?”  means “I’m going to ask for something expensive”.

“How much do you love me?”  means “I did something you're not going to like.

“I’m not yelling!”  means “Yes, I am yelling because I think this is important”.

“I’ll be ready in a minute” means “Be patient, It'll be a while”.

“Five minutes” means “Half an hour”.

“Fine” means “I know I am right, but can’t stand to hear you argue any longer”.

“Nothing” means “I am too mad; I am not going to talk about it”. It also means that you ARE going to talk about it, for at least “Five Minutes”, and it will end with the word “Fine”.

“Go ahead” means “Don’t you dare!”  Otherwise, she’ll get upset over “Nothing” and you'll have a “Five Minutes” discussion followed by “Fine”.

“Do what you want” means “You'll pay for this later”.

“It’s Okay” is an ambiguous statement that can mean “Fine”, “Go ahead” or “Do what you want”.

Only the most dedicated man, who is willing to try and understand the flying object of his affection, can get “It’s Okay”, meaning “It’s Okay”. (You poor thing, you will never really understand her, but it’s Okay).

It’s Okay not to understand women. Deprived of their mystery, they would not be able to fly. This is unthinkable. Women are Unexplained Flying Objects – whether on white wings of an angel, or translucent wings of a fairy, or on a broomstick of a real woman – they soar.